The internet right now feels very much like, “If your friend jumped off a cliff, would you do it too?” Algorithms give way to groupthink, which is dangerous on so many levels.

When your feed is heavily curated to feed you what you want to hear (and monetized for doing so), it’s creating a bubble lacking the necessity of “no” people. No matter your circle, a healthy group should always include a few “no” people. Real friends shouldn’t agree with you on everything all the time. If all you encounter are people who agree with you, you’re just feeding your ego, giving way to throw away what’s ethical.

Normalizing online behaviors because everyone does it and it’s trendy is no different than participating in dangerous bystander behaviors. This culture supports terrible behaviors that adults participate in and then question why the youth imitate such behaviors.

We can’t want better without doing better. We also can’t accept behaviors online that we wouldn’t accept in person. For example, I refuse to entertain online arguments because I know that it doesn’t take bravery or courage to have online opinions. “Hurt my feelings to my face,” is what I always encourage anyone who wants to argue online. Note, I don’t want to argue in person either because I’m a peaceful person, but you get my drift.

The algorithm can’t be to blame if it feeds you what you entertain or choose to nibble on. Demand better by being better online. Standing out against the crowd isn’t bad; in fact, leaning into facts is rare nowadays in a vacuum that’s profiting off pure feelings.

So, before you hit “send,” “submit”, or answer, “what’s on your mind,” pause and question if your online behavior matches your in-person energy. If you’re going to be a jerk online, do so in-person. If you’re going to be insensitive online, do know that in-person people are questioning who you are without your followers. “They had over 100k followers,” won’t be etched on your tombstone next to the person who logged off a healthy amount and had five followers. Chasing followers forever is unsustainable and feeds the wrong parts of your ego.

“The moment monetization became accessible for everyone, it gave the wrong people power to post anything for clicks, and they did. And people clicked on it, and then it became the norm not because it was right but because everyone else was doing it.”